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I'm not good at pull ups. push ups. or sit ups. I do however excel at fuck ups Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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It's called karma it's pronounced ha ha fuck you Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Chicks before dicks Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Being a dick won’t make yours and bigger Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Introverts unite, Separately in our own homes Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Ultimately, I just want someone who knows which songs not to talk over Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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I don't snore i dream i am a motorcycle Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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You call it lazy, I call it selective participation Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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If you sprinkle when you tinkle, you’re fucking disgusting Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Surrounded by pricks Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic Cactus
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If you’re going to rattle my cage, you’d best make sure I’m fucking padlocked in it Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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You're so vain you probably think this sign is about you Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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I put the mess in domestic Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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If I manage to survive the rest of the week, I’d like my straight jacket in black Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Orgies don't just start themselves Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Never chase after someone who doesn’t chase you back. So the ice cream man can fuck off for a start. Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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I just knew we’d be friends forever from the moment I discovered that you also have no filter Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Dear Monday, just hand me Friday and nobody gets hurt Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Dear Life, can you at least buy me a drink first Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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Well that escalated quickly” is our family motto Dictionary Print Funny Sarcastic
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